Big Girl Pants and Small Rooms
Staying present in difficult spaces.
I had a different article drafted for this week, but it didn’t align with how I am feeling now, because, honestly, I experienced a slump this week. A few shitty service failings left people in distress and unsupported, and me feeling despondent. When the systems, policies, and procedures miss the mark, sometimes “trying your best” just doesn’t feel like enough.
Is it fair?
No.
I spent a good 48 hours having a strop to myself about it. You know the kind -ranting to the dog, “why do I even bother?”, doom-scrolling silly animal videos, and avoiding all serious media. But then, after that needed self-care slump - and a whinge to my lovely supervisor - I pulled on my big girl pants.
Outside the therapy room, it can feel like we have very little control. But inside the room? There is agency. When the door clicks shut, the waiting lists and the rejected referrals stay on the other side. Inside, we focus on the person, not the referral.
I don’t mean “positive thinking”, which is sometimes helpful but often insulting; I mean something deeper.
I have never met a person yet in whom I couldn’t find a small nugget of hope. Sometimes it’s just in the connection itself; if a connection is possible, then it follows that more is possible. I have faith in people.
Inside the room, we find a smile, some banter, a moment of understanding. The power of these things is huge. Hopefully for the client, but also for me, they are moments of hope that don’t rely on a broken system.
To the smiles, the in-jokes, and the “see you next weeks”: they carry more weight than you think. And not just for the client. They are the quiet proof that, despite the chaos outside, the work we do in here still matters. The message I choose to take into the winter break.
It’s lovely to share a few quiet moments with you today.
My closing question to you: What do you do when you want to leave the room, but know you need to stay?
Until next time,
💛🌿 Helen
If you’d like to support my work or are interested in learning more about working therapeutically with young people, you can:
📕Buy my book ☕ and/or Buy me a virtual toasted teacake or cuppa on Ko-fi 💛